How should the holiday season be spent now?
All children across Turkey received their report cards and the summer vacation period, which will last for 3 months, has begun. There is joy, pride and sometimes sadness that comes with the report card. The important thing is that the sadness is small and temporary. Here, as always, the responsibility falls on the parents. Instead of blaming their children, parents should consider the factors of failure from a wider perspective and guide their children in a constructive way.
Effects of “Scorecard” on Children and Parents
As parents have the right to be happy and proud with a good and very good report card, it is necessary to draw some conclusions from a bad report card. I wonder if the problem is in the child and his ability to work? From family communication with school and teacher? These should be examined in detail, the causes should be determined, and realistic solutions should be brought as a result.
While creating realistic solutions, the child’s development, intellectual (mental) characteristics, tastes and wishes, and special skill areas should be taken into consideration. These emerge in a tolerant and free living environment. Just like life itself, children and young people are also very colorful and diverse. Each one is a value in itself. In our culture, our children are very valuable, but it is often forgotten that they are unique as individuals and as human beings.
The feeling of worthlessness brought about by comparison
The scorecard is actually a document in which a child or adolescent is evaluated. In the evaluation, the child’s mental abilities, personal development and skill areas are evaluated mostly with grades or with the newest version as good – very good. The area rated as good or very good tells us that the child has good equipment and skills in those areas. The areas that are not graded as good need to be focused more on both the family and the teachers, and the reasons should be investigated and the child should be directed for further education and training and even for the choice of profession, according to the underlying cause.
Just as no one living in millions of people is alike, every child’s mental capacity, degree of personal development and skills are more or less different from each other. That is, it cannot be expected that all of them will be the same in all areas. It is obvious, then, that the “comparison” that parents often make is wrong. In addition, this wrong child leads to feelings of worthlessness and guilt at the slightest. Undoubtedly, the most valuable asset of every parent is their child, and the mental and physical health of that precious asset is also the first wish of the parents. Based on this fact, we need to wish our children and adolescents to be healthy, happy and then successful, and we need to provide them beyond wishing.
What kind of holiday?
It can be understood from the holiday that it can be different for each family. For some, it may be to go to the elders of the extended family, for some to go to the beach, to the sea, to the highland, for some, it may be to work with a friendly brother. All kinds of holidays provide special experiences for children and adolescents.
The annual vacation leave of young and working parents may not exactly match with the appropriate summer vacations of their children. However, in our culture, we have unique and beautiful customs and traditions such as getting help from the extended family. This is an inevitable opportunity for children and adolescents. Spending a different time and life with relatives outside of routine life provides unexpected positive contributions to both individual and social development.
