It’s a good idea not to be too tolerant of an intruder in your bedroom who suddenly sneaks into your room with your spouse while you’re sleeping at night, and gets cranky to stay alone in his room.
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Almost every parent has had a problem at one time or another, children who don’t want to sleep alone. The first year of life is the period when the ‘basic sense of trust’ develops in the child. In this first year of life, a child needs to be with his mother, to be shown love and to be cared for. The mouth and lips are the most important means of expressing the needs of the child, recognizing the outside world and feeding him. For this reason, breastfeeding is of great importance not only in terms of feeding your child, but also in terms of providing a sensual contact with you and relieving tensions. In this period, it is important that your child is in the closest place that your child can reach, in meeting these needs of your child
In the next period, separations begin to become less worrying for your child and the tension it creates decreases to levels that can be tolerated much more easily than before. For various reasons, if this first year of your child’s life passes with long-term separations and indifference, he or she will tend to display an insecure, insecure, avoidant, introvert or lack of empathy structure in their close relationships in the following years.
For all these reasons, and also for your child’s sleep-wake habit, formation of eating habits and for you to learn to adapt to it, your baby needs you to sleep together, especially in the first year.
After this age, your child can get used to being apart if they can reach him easily, even though his mother and father are in a separate room. Basically, the development of the ability to sleep in a separate room is very enjoyable for your child, just like walking, running and holding a spoon. The fact that your child can sleep in a separate room ensures a comfortable start to the kindergarten and school processes. The “sleeping in one’s own room” experience, which may cause anxiety at first, will turn into a proud action as time passes and the anxiety gradually decreases as time passes.
Your Duties
Your task during these transitional periods is to understand the anxiety your child may have, and to be supportive and encouraging. If you feel anxious after your child’s unsuccessful experience and feel guilty about being rigid, it will discourage your child’s next attempt. For example; It is a wrong behavior to take your child who has started to sleep in his/her own room back to your room after any fearful dream. Instead, it would be better to sit next to the bed for a while, patting your child’s head, and then letting them sleep. Also, not leaving your child’s room; It will cause changes in the bedtimes of you, your spouse and your child, you as parents may have to sleep in separate rooms, which may negatively affect your relationship.
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