Üsküdar University Founding Rector, Psychiatrist Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan made an evaluation on 8 March International Women’s Day.
Stating that March 8, International Women’s Day, is an international day defined by the United Nations, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan reminded that attention is drawn to the development of women’s political and social awareness on the basis of human rights, and the celebration of their economic, political and social achievements.
The view that “women are behind men” is changing
Noting that discrimination against women is a socio-cultural situation encountered all over the world, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan said, “International Women’s Day can also be interpreted as follows: It is a symbol of existence against the tendency of men to see women as second class. This view is a sociocultural situation. There is a traditional trend that ‘women are behind men’. Moreover, this is the case not only in Eastern culture, but also in Western culture; even more intense in the Western world. There for centuries, “Is a woman human or not?” controversy has taken place. Even the laws would not accept that a woman is an individual. Because physical strength was important in previous centuries, the world conjuncture required male dominance. However, when mental power came to the fore in our age, this power was no longer needed. When the importance of mental strength was understood, the differences between men and women were minimized.
Strong cooperation should be established in the difference between men and women
Noting that with the changing and developing conditions in line with the developments in the world, priority should be given to establishing strong cooperation within the difference between men and women, rather than equality between women and men. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan said, “Within the framework of this determination, it should not be understood that the differences between the two sexes are rejected. The thought of “Let men change their masculinity and women’s femininity and let the world move towards uni-sex” is wrong. Both sexes should maintain their differences and develop relationships based on strong cooperation. This is what matters in democracy and pluralism. Everyone preserves their own cultural identity, but communication intensifies,” he said.
“One type” does not conform to cosmic unity
Noting that the universe was founded on pluralism and not created in a uniform, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan said, “Thousands of flowers have been created with bird or insect species. The purpose of this diversity is primarily to provide communication between people. It is the fusion of living things with each other, establishing relationships and revealing some beauties. For this reason, the idea of a single type of woman or man does not conform to the unity in the universe. This must be known and used to diversity. A world should be created where the parties are not treated unfairly, the person whose mental success is superior is positioned ahead and ahead, and the person who realizes himself and reveals his value with his actions is not discriminated against because of his gender. A person’s success should not be delayed because of his gender.
For example, there are male-dominated professions where women are discriminated against because of their gender; they are unwittingly excluded. “Women’s day can be thought of to prevent these, or to initiate such discussions and to question some taboos and dogmas,” she said.
There are three stages of marriage
Stating that there are three stages in marriage, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan, “First; the initial stage fueled by romantic feelings. Latter; the period when there is a power struggle, in which both sides will get to know each other and produce smart solutions. Then there is the period of commitment. There is nothing in the world that makes people more happy than the fidelity-based union of men and women,” he said.
The house is not just a place used like a hotel.
Noting that after the feminist movements, divorces in America exceeded 50 and the births out of wedlock increased extraordinarily, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan said, “The married ones have started to live with their children and lovers! Their life, ‘we got married but we couldn’t make each other happy. For the future of our children, let’s be together, even if it is in this way,’ they continue with the understanding. In other words, there is a house in the middle that two strangers use as a hotel. To what extent can parents meet their children’s psychological needs by being together in the same house under these conditions? This is something that needs to be considered,” he said.
In marriage, both happiness and responsibilities should be shared.
Stating that marriage means sharing problems and responsibilities as well as happy moments, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan said, “Couples should not only share their negatives and life burdens with each other. There should be happiness and fun in marriage. If this can be achieved, the spouses will not be attracted to others. In family therapy, we ask couples to write down what they enjoy doing with their partner. Some say they want to walk when it’s raining, some say they want to do sports together. We advise couples to increase the things they enjoy doing together. During turbulent times in a marriage, spouses can also seek professional help if they have difficulty following these recommendations. Storms can only be overcome when positive features are reinforced.
prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan pointed out that if the marriage turns into a war in which the “I am strong” conflict between men and women, it will move away from the emotionality it should bear.
Noting that in traditional culture, women are seen as “someone who will take care of children and home”, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan said, “Some men even think that ‘women should believe that they are inferior’. There are even men who say, ‘If I didn’t want to have a son, I wouldn’t get married’. In such marriages, the woman feels worthless. For example, there are women who are much more intelligent and productive than men. In this case, if her husband says ‘my wife is trying to prove herself to me, she is acting contrary to what I want’, it means she has familial, cultural or psychological prejudices. “Problems are solved by searching and finding the emotions behind the prejudices,” he said.
Source: (BHA) – Beyaz News Agency
