WHAT SHOULD I CONSIDER WHEN MY CHILD STARTS TO SCHOOL
Your child, whom you raised with great devotion, is now at school age. Both you and he have entered an important turning point. You have found the answers to the questions of which school should I send it to, who will be the teacher, should I give it to the service, or should I bring it and take it away, and it’s just a short time before your school life starts.
Now here are the answers to the following questions. I wonder if he will have problems, how will we cope with the problems he has, how should we help him, what should we pay attention to when doing homework
Here are the questions and answers in your mind
At what age should my child start school?
According to the new education system, children who have turned 5 on September 30, 2012 are required to start school. However, considering the social, emotional and physical development of children, the age of 5 is not suitable for starting school.
If your child is 5 years old (60 months), he should attend kindergarten, if he is 5.5 years old (66 months), it should be decided to start school after the school readiness test.
How should I take my child to school, what should I do on the first day?
Before your child starts school, you should prepare him for school preferably during the summer. You should tell him what the school is like, what he will learn there, and show his difference from kindergarten clearly but without worrying him. Because the biggest problem that children experience is getting used to the more regular primary school environment after the kindergarten environment.
It is very important for him that you go to school with him on the first day. But don’t make it a ceremony. Wake up like every day, have breakfast and go to school with your child. The more you care and exaggerate on the first day, the more your child will care and exaggerate. This makes it difficult for him to leave you and get used to school.
What should I do if my child cries in the schoolyard or in the classroom?
The child’s crying actually depends on your behavior. If you make your child feel sorry with your words or facial expressions, if you create the impression that you are leaving him, he will use it and start to cry.
All you have to do is kiss him as usual and wish him luck. He will be next to your teacher in class, you can tell him what you need, he will help you. You can also play games with your friends during recess. In the evening, you must say I will come to pick you up (if it will come with the shuttle, the shuttle will bring you home) and send him to his class
Remember, children are afraid of what they do not know. If you send him to the class without any explanation about the school, he will worry and cry because he does not know what he will encounter.
Should I wait for him at school for a few days?
Waiting for the child at school does not make it easier for him to get used to school, on the contrary, it prolongs the process of separation from parents, independence and self-confidence.
If you are also a parent with concerns, you can wait for your child at school for a day or two without letting him know, without telling him. But it is very important that your child does not know this. Because he wants to come to you at every opportunity and wants you to stay at school for longer periods. It is also important that classmates are not aware of it. Because they can tell your child that you are at school.
If you have made the necessary explanations to your child and prepared him/her well for school life, you will see that everything is easily overcome and you will be happy.
What should we pay attention to when talking about school at home?
When talking to your spouse or other family members at home, be careful not to use negative statements about school. Your child may be watching TV or playing with his friend, but his ear is with you, he is listening carefully.
Negative expressions you will use especially about teachers and friends may cause your child to have negative feelings and thoughts towards them.
If you complain about the abundance of homework, the difficulty of the lessons, the attitude of the teacher; After a while, your child also makes similar complaints, and this may cause him to feel alienated from school and decrease his success in school.
Therefore, use positive expressions when talking about school as much as possible, and try to highlight the good aspects of your teacher and friends.
What should I do if my child does not want to go to school?
If your child does not want to go to school, there must be a valid reason. Investigate this reason rather than forcing him to go to school. Talk to your child, find out if he has a problem, talk to the teacher, school administration or even the bus driver.
If the problem is not something you can solve on your own, get professional help. You can seek help from a child psychologist, pedagogue or school counselor.
What should I do if my child does not want to go to school using his sibling as an excuse?
Many children with younger siblings wonder what their mother and siblings are doing when they go to school, they become jealous of their siblings and therefore do not want to go to school.
You can take precautions to avoid this situation, and you can make the necessary explanation before your child asks you or makes it a problem. You can explain to your child that when you go to school, I put your brother to sleep, when he wakes up, I feed him his food and change his diaper, and then we wait for you to come back from school. Do not describe the other activities you do together (shopping, going to the house, going to the park etc.) So he won’t be jealous of you and his brother.
How should I help my child with homework?
Do not force your child to do homework immediately after they come home from school. He will need to rest as he has had a busy day.
Do not sit next to him and watch him when he starts doing his homework after the rest and meal time is over. Let him do his homework alone. If there is something he cannot do or has difficulty with, after he has finished all his homework, help him do what he cannot do.
Help her with her project assignments, but don’t do it for her.
Don’t be afraid to say you don’t know when there is something you don’t know. Not everyone has to know everything. Your child should not see you as perfect, on the contrary, knowing that there are things that you can’t achieve makes him happy. Consult other people you think might have knowledge on the subject.
What should I do if he doesn’t want to do homework?
Do not force him to finish his homework when he does not want to do his homework, it will not help to set goals for him and use unnecessary rewards and punishments.
Find out why she doesn’t want to do homework instead. The homework given may be too difficult for him, or he may be under-leveled and bored. Clarify this situation by talking to the teacher.
The homework environment may not be suitable. You cannot have the child do homework in front of the television, in an environment where family members are chatting.
Don’t expect him to sit down and finish all his homework at once. Let him take short breaks without asking. Drinking a glass of juice, eating a slice of cake, sharing an incident at school can be a suitable break for him. Watching television, playing the computer, playing games should not be used as a break; These should be activities to be done after homework is over.
How can I make the most of my child’s weekends?
Take care to spend weekends with your child. You may be working in a busy schedule. But especially after starting school, the moments you will spend with your child will be less. These moments should be special for him and for you.
Doing a favorite activity together is the best reward you can give him. You can enroll your child in a course (sports, music, painting, etc.) within your means. He can relieve the intensity and fatigue he experienced at school in these courses, and he can prepare for the new week with new energy.
What should I do if he starts swearing, lying, using physical violence after starting school, or if his speech and behavior are different?
After your child starts school, it’s normal to have differences in behavior. These are not always positive. Because they will be together with children from different socio-cultural backgrounds at school. He will see behaviors and ways of speaking that he has not seen in the family before. Children will begin to exhibit these behaviors as they learn by modelling.
In such a situation, do not panic. Constantly warning your child with expressions such as don’t do it, don’t say that, it’s very shameful will not solve the problem. Warn him of the consequences of his behavior. Explain why that friend did this behavior in a language that he or she can understand; but don’t use derogatory terms to your friends. If necessary, notify the teacher of the situation.
How often should I meet with the teacher, what should I ask in these meetings?
Do not go to school to see the teacher constantly. This makes you and the teacher tiring, overwhelmed, and harms your child’s image in front of their friends.
You can have a general meeting with the teacher once a week. Also, be sure to follow and attend parent meetings. In these meetings, get information about your child’s school success, friendships, special skills, if any, social and emotional development, and try to get guidance for your school problems.
Do not make conversations with the teacher while your child is present. He doesn’t need to know what you’re talking about. After the interview, inform your child about the interview in general. Make sure to use positive expressions.
Your child should not see your conversation with the teacher as a conversation that you are complaining about. Therefore, do not scare your child with the teacher. This may cause him to feel alienated from the teacher and school.
If I observe what behaviors in my child, should I think that he/she has problems with school success?
Although it differs in every child; If you are faced with problems such as reluctance to do homework, difficulty in doing homework, getting low grades despite working, not being able to pass grades properly on the board at school, and missing homework, you may be experiencing problems with school success.
What should I do if my child has attention deficit and hyperactivity disorder?
In order to determine whether your child has such a problem, you should definitely talk to the teacher, get information about his/her behavior in the classroom, then consult a specialist to have him/her screened in detail.
If your child is diagnosed with attention deficit and hyperactivity disorder after all these; First, inform the teacher about the situation. Because the teacher will adjust the sitting arrangement of the child in the classroom accordingly, and will organize the activities to ensure active participation in the work done.
At home, especially while studying, take care to take short breaks and do relaxing activities, not distracting activities during breaks (for example, not watching TV, drinking a glass of juice and eating a slice of cake). Don’t expect him to finish all his homework at once, that’s not possible.
If drug treatment has been started by your doctor, continue the drug treatment at the specified dose, do not stop the drug on your own or change the dose.
If my child has a learning disability and what should I do?
As soon as you learn about this situation, first inform your teacher. Ask the teacher to inform other parents as well, this is important for the acceptance of the child by his friends.
Do not hesitate to get a report for your child from the hospital and guidance research center if necessary. With this report, you can get free education in special education and rehabilitation centers. In addition, with this report, your child will be an inclusion student and will not take the same written exams as other children and will not be evaluated according to the same evaluation criteria. This is very important for your child’s self-confidence.
What are the main causes of school problems?
School problems can have many causes. Vision and hearing problems can prevent the child from reading, listening to the teacher, and doing his lessons.
Spending too much time on activities such as sports and entertainment can also tire the child out.
Child’s chronic diseases, anxiety, depression, problems between parents, sibling jealousy can prevent the child’s academic success.
In addition, special learning difficulties, attention deficit and hyperactivity disorder seen in children also prevent school success.
What could be the social-emotional problems my child may experience at school?
Not being accepted by his friends, not being able to communicate with children from different socio-cultural backgrounds, communication problems that he may experience because he is too introverted and emotional or too belligerent, not following the rules, difficulties in acting with the group are some of the social-emotional problems you may encounter.
If you encounter one or more of the above-mentioned problems, do not force your child to change behavior, do not judge him. Get help from your teacher and an expert on the subject.
