A special bond is established between mother, father and child at every birth. The relationship of family members acquires a new dimension. As soon as the new baby arrives from the hospital, rivalry between siblings arises and sometimes lasts for many years. Jealousy is natural and very painful. But it is dynamic and allows the child to move forward into the future. Sibling rivalry is a reflection of real life. In order for jealousy not to turn into destructive and prevent the child’s life, some suggestions for the prenatal and postnatal period regarding the new baby’s participation in the family are as follows:
The bedrooms of the baby and the other sibling should be separated if possible, and the child’s preferences should be given importance in the arrangement of the space.
Other siblings should be given the opportunity to name the new baby.
The sibling can be found in the ultrasonography examination or the images obtained can be shown to him as well.
Some children worry that the mother will be harmed during childbirth. Short and accurate information about the formation and birth of the baby should be given to the child by the parents.
Parents can read and discuss stories about the addition of a new baby to the family with their children.
Preschool age child can gain experience on how the future baby will change their daily lives by playing with the doll, washing and dressing it with the participation of parents.
Visiting if there is a newborn baby in the close family and friends circle, and the parents’ embrace and love of the baby prepares the child for the birth of his sibling.
It is recommended that the child be informed about when the birth will take place, that the child be asked for help appropriate for his age in the preparations, and that the child visits the mother and baby in the hospital after the birth.
It is important for parents to explain to the child that they will love the baby as they love themselves.
The child should be given age-appropriate responsibility for the care of the baby. For example, a preschool age child may be asked to bring his sibling’s diaper, and an older sibling in primary school may be asked to prepare the baby’s food.
In addition to the pictures of the newborn, the baby photos of the sibling should be exhibited in the home environment. If available, the video footage should be shown to the child and it should be explained through concrete examples that he needed the mother’s intensive care when he was a baby.
It is important that parents make the child feel that with the newborn they will not lose their place in the family, but will gain new rights. For example, “Your brother will stay at home because he is small, but you can come to the movies with us.”
The most common parental attitudes fueling sibling jealousy; determining a pupil in the family, comparing children with each other, taking sides by gender discrimination.
