A series of positive, neutral or negative events take place in the world, and accordingly, the relationship between our thoughts and emotions is as follows.
Thoughts: We interpret events with a series of thoughts that are constantly running through our minds. This is called ‘inner speech’.
Mood: Our emotions are formed by our thoughts, not current events. All experiences must be processed in the brain and given conscious meaning before experiencing any emotional response.
The relationship between our thoughts and our emotions. It is our emotions, not events, that cause changes in our mood. If we are sad, our thoughts reflect a realistic interpretation of negative events. But if we are depressed or anxious, our thoughts are often illogical, distorted, and unrealistic. Sometimes they are just wrong. The comments below are ‘errors of thought’. These are inferences made from distortions of reality.
- All-or-nothing thinking: Everything is thought of in black and white. If something is not very good, it is considered very bad. Individuals who make this mistake of thinking frequently are afraid of making mistakes because they will feel worthless, unsuccessful and inadequate as a result. However, it is unrealistic to evaluate events in this way. Because life is seldom ‘one way or another’. There is no absolute. If we force everything to an absolute limit, it will bring depression. Because our perceptions do not match the facts and no exaggerated expectations are met.
- Overgeneralization: Extremes of all-or-nothing thinking. For example, the statement ‘no one will ever love me and I will always be unhappy’ after a breakup can be an example of this.
- Mental filter: Focusing on a negative detail in an event and perceiving the whole event as if it were negative. It is a thought error that feeds especially depressive feelings. Because the person who often makes this mistake of thinking is like wearing negative glasses. Everything that clings to your consciousness is negative.
- Ignoring the positive: Positive events are often overlooked. Even positive events can be quickly turned into negative with a sudden maneuver. For example, when someone appreciates you for your work or anything, it’s like saying ‘he’s just trying to be nice’. This trivializes and devalues the situation.
- Foreseeing the future, understanding destiny, fortune-telling: Thinking that something bad will happen and accepting this prediction as true even though it is unrealistic. Everything is predicted to turn bad.
- Zoom in or out: To magnify your own faults, fears, or flaws as if they were important (which also leads to this catastrophic thinking error.) is to downplay almost all of your good, strengths, and accomplishments.
- Emotional inferences: Perceiving emotions as evidence of reality. In other words, it is like saying ‘I feel unsuccessful, then I am a failure’ in the face of a situation or event. This is how logic works. But this kind of reasoning is irrational. Because emotions are formed as a result of thoughts and beliefs. If there are errors and distortions in thoughts, then the emotion felt is not valid.
- Should, Should statements: Although these types of statements may seem motivating, they often create pressure and can cause anger. Imposing statements about ourselves, others, and the world always contain expectation. And these expectations are often unrealistic. Shame, guilt, and disappointment often occur when our or others’ behavior falls below these standards.
- Labeling: It can be defined as the advanced form of overgeneralization. The philosophy of this statement is ‘the measure of a person is the mistakes he makes’. It is judging ourselves completely negatively based on our mistakes. Instead of describing the mistake, it is stigmatizing ourselves. It’s like saying ‘I’m a failure’ instead of saying ‘I failed at this job’. Labeling is illogical as it may feel bad. Because as individuals we cannot be measured by a single thing we do.
- Personalization: It is a thinking error that occurs when the person blames himself for an event that is not in his full control. Personalization brings along feelings of guilt as well as helplessness.
We think that our emotions are directly caused by the events that occur. But in fact, the way we ‘make sense of and perceive’ that event is different. So our thoughts. Our emotions are formed as a result of our thoughts. And it is often negative thought content that causes us to feel negative emotions. In everyday life, we all often make thinking mistakes. But as this situation becomes permanent and reality is neglected, we begin to see things not as they are but as we ‘mean them’. During the therapy process with cognitive behavioral therapy, it is aimed to notice these thinking errors, to take a closer look at our thoughts, to question them, to research their reality and then to produce alternative thoughts. Making adjustments to the irrational thinking system brings about a change in mood.
