This information should not be shared with the child before the divorce decision is clear and both couples are sure of their decision. After the divorce decision, it is usual for couples to solve their problems and get back together. Therefore, although this development is tolerable for the couple, it is more difficult for the child to accept and return to the old order. The child’s knowledge of divorce makes us think that such a possibility may always exist, even if the parents are reconciled.
While the divorce decision is shared with the child, if possible, two individuals should give the news together. If the couples do not want to be together, a conversation can be held with the child separately. It is not right to play polyana while giving this news to the child. No matter how it is said, this news will be sad and worrying for the child. The important thing is to inform the child in a way that he/she does not see himself/herself as the reason for separation.
In a divorced family, the child should know that there will be no change in his own life and that he will continue to see his parents whenever he wants. Parents should explain to the child that their love for their children is permanent. The child should know that in the new order, his parents will be in his life and that the roles of mother and father will not change. It should be explained to the child in a way that he or she can understand what will happen next and what changes will occur.
The child should be aware of the decisions taken and the changes to be made. From now on, the child should be told who will live where and how often they will be seen. The child should be allowed to ask questions, and the questions should be answered in a way that he or she can understand.
